The counselors and my kids were completely delighted with the effect of tossing my husband into the lake. The laughter and back slapping lasted for several minutes.
“Congrats honey. You too have been initiated.” I said as he swam over to myself and the kids, all bobbing in the water.
“Could have done without that.” Himself responded with a smirk as he slapped his soaking wet hat back onto his head and the kids broke out into giggles.
I smiled at him and laughed. “You’re a good sport.”
“I guess it’s a small price to pay to stay and eat for free on my ‘vacation’,” he said using the air quotes.
“True.”
It only took Ben one dive to retrieve the sunken folding chair from the bottom of the lake. He handed it up to Angus who walked it, dripping all the way, back down from whence it came. He plunked it down rather ceremoniously. Noticing a small puddle in the seat, Angus tilted the chair forward and the water splashed onto the dock. He then walked back and looking to Himself he gestured towards the chair with a flourish of his hands.
“Please excuse our interruption,” Angus said with a fake British accent. “Feel free to return to your previous activities.”
“Mmmm K. Thanks.” Himself deadpanned. Again the counselors and the kids erupted into laughter.
Himself climbed out of the lake with the empty Diet Coke can in hand, sloshed his way down to his chair. He placed the can on the dock, picked up his financial magazine, sat in the chair, licked his finger to turn the page and resumed reading. You would hardly know anything had happened except for the water dripping steadily, forming a large puddle underneath him.
Immediately following this, the counselors spontaneously organized a belly flop competition amongst themselves. My three kids and myself climbed out of the water and sat on the wooden supply box. It was pretty painful just watching as the counselors jumped off the diving board, spread-eagle and slammed into the water. We all shook our heads, guffawed, and groaned as we listened to their bellies slap against the surface of the water.
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| OOOF! |
The kids and I helped with the judging as we dripped dry in the afternoon sun. We based scores on the size of the splash, how horizontal the flopper was and the sound that was created. The event went on for quite sometime as the counselors would belly flop, get out and line up again for their next attempt. Things began to slow when, one by one, counselors bailed on the activity as their skin began to sting from the repeated impact. Finally only Ben and Angus were the remaining two contestants.
“OK guys. This is the final round. It’s all or nothing. Whoever scores the highest on this belly flop will be declared the ‘Camp Acorn Belly Flop King’!” Angus proclaimed. Silence fell over everyone on the dock.
Ben performed his final belly flop. It was well executed with a moderate sized splash, the angle was good and the sound was loud. Angus then performed his final belly flop but he didn’t achieve an optimal horizontal angle and as a result both the sound and the splash were smaller. It looked like Ben was going to take the crown when we all heard a voice.
“Is it my turn?”
We all turned to towards the sound of the voice. It was Himself sitting in his lawn chair, knees and arms crossed.
“Oh yeah!” Ben clapped his hand, delighted. “I need some real competition. Bring it on!”
The crowd parted to let Himself through. He stepped up onto the diving board. Cracked his neck twice and then let rip the most enormous belly flop of the afternoon. It was pretty much perfect. We all laughed and cheered!
“Can I try?”
We turned again towards this new voice. It was Father Brian! He had come down, undetected, to the dock for an afternoon dip. He pulled off his shirt and rubbed his lilly-white belly.
“Oh ya, Father!” Angus cried out. The counselors cheered and clapped.
“Father! Father! Father! Father!” Everyone chanted as they followed him to the diving board.
Father Brian stepped up to the diving board and performed some arm circles, bent down and touched his toes a couple of times, then he stood up and did some side bends. We all giggled at his preparations.
“Ah get on with it!” Himself chided Father Brian as he was pulling himself up the ladder. The audience snickered.
“Alright, alright,” Father waved away Himself dismissively and then took a deep breath. He raised up onto the balls of his feet. He swept his arms out to his sides and then sprung forward into the water.
It was the winner…and the crowd went wild…
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| AAAAAHHHH! |
Memoirs of a Camp Nurse 